Understanding Challenges in Parenting Teens
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As the baby boomer generation matures, parenting teens becomes more and more of a critical issue. Teenagers are the face of the future and represent the next generation. The age gap, changes in expectations and even the use of technology are issues in adolescent development. As teens, once cuddly toddlers now demand and assert their independence.
What factors affect parenting teenagers and lead to growing pains for parents of teens? Let's review several challenges that teens face during the middle school and adolescent years. The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry identifies four major movements in early and late adolescent development.
First, teens participate in a movement toward independence. In this process, teens struggle with their own sense of identity and a greater self focus, alternating between poor self-esteem and high expectations. As teens awaken to themselves, they can feel awkward about their body, experience moodiness, express themselves more readily by talking, showing less affection (and sometimes rudeness) when dealing with parents, greater influence by their own peers on clothing and other interests among others.
Second, teenagers grow and make changes in interests and cognitive awareness. This is expressed through a greater interest in the present time without thinking of the future, growing by expanding their intellectual interests and a greater ability to do mental, physical, and emotional work.
Third, during teenage years, adolescents blossom in sexuality. This is evident through displays of shyness and modesty, concerns about how physically or sexually attractive they might be. There is an increased interest in sex and relationships that change often. Teenagers have a greater amount of anxiety and worry over being normal or what others might think.
Fourth, teens explore the personal meaning of morals, values and self-direction. Teens test rules and limits and begin to develop abstract thinking. During the same time, teenagers begin developing their own conscience and ideals and begin to select role models. Teens are open to experiment with sex and drugs (cigarettes, alcohol and marijuana, among others.)
In later high school years, teens develop each of these four movements to a higher degree, including a firmer sense of identity, increased emotional stability and concern for others, more self-reliance and delayed gratification, greater self-reflection and thinking through ideas.
Unlike the earlier teen years, older teenagers begin to consider the future and take responsibility for their actions. Sexuality expresses itself more in feelings of love and passion, more serious relationships and an increase capacity for tenderness. Self-direction, morals and values emerge with a greater ability to set goals, use insights, develop personal dignity and self-esteem and an interest in moral reasoning. Parenting teens successfully will help adolescents recognize the growth that is taking place and affirming their self worth.
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