Happy Marriage
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Do you want to turn the key to a happy marriage? Did you and your wife exchange love letters after you started dating and became engaged? If so, you are on the right track. Personal love letters are one of the oldest forms of communication between a husband and wife. The Baby Boomer generation is credited with bringing the values of sharing emotional feelings and friendship to enliven a marriage relationship. Writing personal love letters have taken on a new meaning as an expression of care and being connected.
The success of marriage enrichment programs like Marriage Encounter depends upon writing down your feelings to your spouse and sharing them in a loving, personal conversation known as dialogue. A personal love letter is a form of everyday honeymoon that every married many can give freely to his wife.
Dr. W. Bradford Wilcox, Assistant Professor of Sociology at the University of Virginia ranks a husband's emotional engagement as the number one predictors of women's marital happiness. A married man who writes love letters to his wife can count on her happiness.
In his book, "Good Husband, Great Marriage," Mark Robert Alter recognizes that women are miles ahead of men in relationships. Men are coming back though and have a great capacity for love and communication. Many baby boomer men often ask , "What do I say in a love letter to my wife?" Here are four tips that married men can use to communicate in writing.
Tip Number One: Be Positively Personal with Your Wife
Wives love to read, save and reread love letters and personal notes. It helps
to smooth out a rough day. The first tip for a personal love letter is to make
it personal and positive. Love letters are like delivering a bouquet of flowers.
Every beautiful word affirms a married woman. Make a list of the positive things
about your wife that you want to affirm. Focus on the positive.
Tip Number Two: It's About Her
A personal love letter from a married man to his wife is a direct communication
between the two. Use the word "you" early and often. Share your feelings.
My parents have been married for more than 55 years. On my mom's 80th birthday,
our family gave personal testimonies that we taped and made into a DVD. My dad
stood up and used the song, "You Mean All the World to Me." He choked
up with emotion in front of us all and it was so powerful to witness the love
he had for his wife. Make your wife feel special, too.
Tip Number Three: Start with a Special Endearment and Make It Pretty
If you have a special name for your wife, use it. Write a personal
greeting, like:
- My most beautiful ______________ (your wife's name)
- Dear wonder of my life
- You're the best thing that happened to me
Wives love getting a special gift and the wrapping is often as important as what's inside. In other words, unless you don't have any choice, don't write your personal love letter on the back of a paper bag. Make it pretty. Use special stationery (you can visit a scrapbook store and buy just one sheet for less than 50 cents.) Or write your letter in a greeting card from Hallmark. Decorate it with a personal drawing like hearts or XOXO (shorthand for hugs and kisses), or use stickers.
Tip Number Four: Make it Specific and Meaningful with Love
As you build up your skill with a little practice, writing a personal
love letter becomes an excellent habit! Make sure that the letter you write
contains things that are specific and meaningful to your marriage, yourself
and your wife.
For example, you may write a personal love letter on the birth of a child, an anniversary, special thanks for favors done, or for any reason that you can find. (The more reasons, the more letters!) Make love the underlying reason for writing your letter.
A happy marriage is one of the best gifts that a married couple can give to each other. Unlock the heart of your spouse by writing a love letter today.
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