Can I Prevent Divorce?
By Kerry Graylor
Life can be tough when you are trying to prevent divorce. If your spouse wants out of the marriage, it is not necessarily easy to prevent a divorce from happening.
In the case of a no fault divorce, there is usually no way to stop it. There may be a requirement that you must live separately for a period of time but if your spouse has left some time ago then the divorce will go ahead. If one party wants the divorce and all of the requirements for a no fault divorce in your state have been completed, the other spouse cannot stop the divorce.
In the cause of a fault divorce, where your spouse wants to divorce you because of some wrong that you did, you may be able to stop the divorce by convincing the court that you were not at fault. The two of you would have to argue this out in court and it would be for the judge to decide. You will need to take an attorney's advice on the best way to handle this.
If you were having an affair and your spouse knew about your affair for some time before filing for divorce, you could contest the fault divorce by arguing that your spouse condoned the affair. This would mean it would not be grounds for divorce.
You might also be able to argue that the evidence your spouse is providing was the result of connivance. Here you would be saying that your spouse deliberately set you up in a situation that would jeopardize the marriage. For example, if a woman knowingly arranged for her husband to be alone with his former girlfriend. This would be a set-up and could be a defence in court against a fault divorce.
A fault divorce can also be defended on the grounds of provocation. This is where one spouse provokes the other into doing something that would be grounds for divorce. For example, one spouse might provoke the other into leaving the family home, and then try to get a divorce for abandonment.
Generally though these defenses are not often used. Often this is because defending a divorce action requires a lot more time and expenses. Court time is longer because witnesses must be heard, and the case is more complicated for attorneys which adds to the costs.
Also, even if you succeed in defending a divorce, in the long term a spouse who wants out of a marriage can always get a divorce by waiting a little longer. The law is designed to let a person get out of a marriage if they really want to, so it can be very hard to prevent divorce and usually it will be easier on you to allow the divorce to happen and get on with your life.
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